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Best Funny Shayari in Hindi - फनी शायरी - हिंदी शायरी

March 06, 2022

Best Funny Shayari in Hindi

Best Funny Shayari in Hindi- फनी शायरी - हिंदी शायरी

 हमारी बारी जब आयी तो हमसे डॉक्टर बोला
चलो जल्दी दिखाओ,
और भी बीमार बैठे हैं
जो पहले आये थे लेते हैं कब्रिस्तान में जाकर
बचे हैं यहाँ जो दो चार,
तैयार बैठे हैं.

 Humari Baari Jab Aayi To Humse Doctor Bola
Chalo Jaldi Dikhao,
Aur Bhi Bimar Baithe Hain
Jo Pehle Aaye The Lete Hain Kabristan Mein Jaakar
Bache Hain Yahan Jo Do Char,
Taiyaar Baithe Hain.

Maine Pani Me Ek Ka Sikka Dala
Aur God Se Ek Pyara Sa Dost Manga
Mujhe Aap Mil Gaye
Aur Upar Se Awaz Ayi
Ek Rupee Me Itna Hi Milta Hai

Kamar jitni bhi patli ho maza utna nasheela hai,
Chalega jo bhi ho aankhon ka rang kala ya neela hai,
Ishq k naam pe kerte sabhi ab RASLEELA hai,
Main karu to saala character dheela hai.

Phone Mat Kiya Karo Dear,

 Mom Hoti Hai Near,
Papa Se Lagta Hai Fearbaat Bhi Hoti Nahi Clear,
Isliye Sms Karo Dear,
Without Fear & Very Clear.

Har Safalta Par aapka Naam Ho,
Aapke Har Decision Par Kamyabi Ka Mukam Ho,

Thand Aa Gayi Hai Dhyan Rakhna,
Main nahi Chahta aap ko sardi aur jukam Ho.

Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
Wah Wah..
Ershad-Ershad..

Ki Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
aur Nangu pangu Ghumna Ho To,
Aapki Marji!

Arz kiya hai…
LIC wale bhi kya gazab dhate hain,
LIC wale bhi kya gazab dhate hain,
Logon ki biwiyon ke paas ghanton baith k ..
Husband ke marne ke fayde batate hain.

Tum Sa Koi Dusra Jamin Par Hua,
Toh Rab Se Shikayat Hogi,
Ki,
Ek Toh Jhela Nahi Jata,
Doosra Kahi Mil Gaya To Kaya Halat Hogi.

Dil mein khuda hai,
Aankhon mein nasha hai,
Bato mein maza hai,
Chahat mein ada hai,
Andaz bhi juda hai,
Dosti mein wafa hai,
Arey yaar..
Isiliye to sari duniya HUM par fida hai.

Ye Duniya Hai Yahan Pe,
Yeh Tamasha Ho Bhi Sakta Hai,

Abhi Jo Gham Hamara Hai,
Tumhara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai,

Tum Apne Aap Ko Hargiz,
Koi Ilzaam Mat Dena,

Ye Soda Hai Mohabbat Ka,
Khasara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai

Tum Yeh Mat Samajhna,
Tum Hi Meri Akhri Mohabbat Ho,

Mohabbat Jurm Hai,
Hum Se Dobara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai.

Aaj kal tum muskurate bahut ho,
Mere dil ko bhati bahut ho,

Dil kehta hai le jaaun tumhen dinner pe,
Par suna hai tum khaati bahut ho!

Kar Gyi Ghar Mera Khali
Mere So Jaane Ke Baad
Mujhko Dhadka Tha Ke Kuch Hoga Tere Aane Ke Baad
Maine Dono Baar Thane Mein Likhayi Thi Report
Ek Tere Aane Se Pehle,
Ek Tere Jaane Ke Baad.

Aaj mausam mein ajeeb si baat hai,
Bekabu se hamare khayalat hain,

Jee chahta hai chura loon aap ko aapse,
Par mummy kehti hai chori karna paap hai.

Bazuon Me Dum Rakhta Hu,
Dil Me Gham Rakhta Hu,
Pata Tha SMS Ayega Tera,
Isliye Painkiller Sang Rakhta Hu.

Aaj kal tum mushkurati bahut ho,
Mere dil ko bhaati bahut ho,

Dil kehta hai le jaaun tumhen dinner pe,
Par suna hai tum khaati bahut ho!

Aapke Har Gunah Ki Mafi Hai
Aap Jo Roye To Bahut Na Insaafi Hai
Aapki Aankho Mein Na Aaye Kabhi Pani
Kyunki
Behne Ke Liye To Aapki Naak Hi Kafi Hai.

बेझिझक मुस्कुराये जो भी गम है,
जिंदगी में टेंशन किसको कम है,

अच्छा या बुरा तो केवल भ्रम है,
जिंदगी का नाम ही कभी ख़ुशी कभी गम है।

2 Baar Lips Pe,
2 Baar Gaal Pe,

1 Martaba Mathay Pe,
2 Baar Eyes Pe,

Cold Cream Zaroor Lagana,
Sardi Aa Rahi Hai Na.
Happy Winter Season

Har taraf padhai ka saya hai,
Kitabo main sukh kisne paya hai,

Ladke to jate hai tution ladkiyan dekhne,
Aur sir kehte hai dekho itni barsat mai ladka padhne aya hai.

Larki Ro Ro K Larkay Se
Keh Rahi Hai,

Larki Ro Ro K Larke Se
Keh Rahi Hai,

Haath Chooro Jan..

Meri Naak Beh Rahi Hai.
Happy Winter Season
Aaaa….chhii

Kisi ko apna banalo,
ya kisi k ho jao,
agar kuch bhi nahi hota to
DON’T WORRY
chadar-takiya lo aur so jao.

Jab dekha unhone tirchi nazar se,
Kasam khuda ki madhosh ho gaye hum,

Par jab pata chala nazar permanent tirchi hai,
To wahi khade-khade behosh ho gaye hum.

Marne pe hum dono ko jannat mile,
Yeh hava yeh bahar mile,

SMS karne mein kanjusi mat kar mere dost,
Pata nahi jannat mein signal mile ya na mile.

Dil ki dhadkan ruk c gayi hain,
Saanse meri tham c gai hain,
Pucha humne dil k doctor se to pata chala
Es dil me aapki yaaden..
Sardi ki wajah se jam c gai.

दिल की धड़कन रुक सी गई,
सांसें मेरी थम सी गई,
पूछा हमने दिल के डॉक्टर से तो पता चला,
कि सर्दी के कारण आपकी यादें दिल में जम सी गई।

Tumhari yaad dil se jaane nahi denge,
Tumhare jaisa dost khone bhi nahi denge,

Roz sharafat se sms kiya karo warna,
Ek kaan k neeche denge or rone bhi nahi denge.

Har doori mitani padhti hai,
har baat btani padhti hai,
lagta hai dosto ke pass waqt hi nahi hai,
aaj kal khud apni yaad dilane padhti hai.

Dil sapno se ‘HOUSEFULL’ hai..
Pura hona bhi ‘DOUTFULL’ hai..

Is Duniya me har Chiz ‘WONDERFUL’ hai.
Kyuki life tum jaise dosto se ‘COLOURFUL’ hai.. 

Dhadkan dil ki ruk jati hai,
Sanse aksar tham jati hai,
Bahut buri halat hoti hai yaaro,
Jab Girlfriend se shadi karne ki naubat aati hai..!

Zindagi Behaal Hai,
Sur Hai Na Taal Hai,

Message Box Bhi Kangal Hai,
Kya Aapki Sms Factory Mein Hadtal Hai,

Yaar Kuchh Toh Bhejo,
Yeh Mere Mobile Ki Zindagi Ka Sawal Hai.

Jab Jab Ghire Badal Teri Yaad Aayi,
Jab Jhoom Ke Barsa Sawan Teri Yaad Aayi,
Jab-Jab Main Bhiga Teri Yaad Aayi,
Ab Raha Nahi Jata,
Chattri Lauta De Bhai.

Majnu Ko Laila Ka SMS Nahi Aaya,
Majnu Ne Do Din Se Khana Nahi Khaya,
Majnu Marne Vala Tha Laila K Pyaar Me,
Laila Baithee Thee Sms Free Hojane Ke Intezar Me.

Meri prem kahani ka kya ajeeb ending tha,
Meri prem kahani ka kya ajeeb ending tha,
Maine propose kia SMS se,
Kambakth woh uski shaadi tak pending tha.

Hum Aaj Bhi Dil Ka Aashiyana Sajane Se Darte Hai,
Baagon Mein Phool Khilane Se Darte Hai,
Hamari Ek Pasand Se Tut Jayenge Hazaaro Dil,
Tabhi Toh Hum Aaj Bhi Girl friend Banane Se Darte Hai.

Umar ki raah mein JAZBAAT badal jate hai,
Waqt ki AAndhi me HALAT badal jaate hai,

Sochta hoon kaam kar kar ke Record tod dun,
Lekin kambhakt salary dekhte he KHAYAAL badal jaate hai..

उम्र की राह में जज्बात बदल जाते है।
वक़्त की आंधी में हालात बदल जाते है
सोचता हूं काम कर-कर के रिकॉर्ड तोड़ दूं।
कमबख्त सैलेरी देख के ख्यालात बदल जाते हैं

Nazar mili jab wo akeli thi,
Dosti hui tab sath saheli thi,
Pyar hua to vo pehli thi,
Dusre ke sath bhag gai tab pata chala..
Wo us area ki CHIKNI CHAMELI thi.

Kabhi hausla bhi aazmana chahiye,
Bure waqt mein bhi muskurana chahiye,
Chahe kitni bhi thand pade hafte mein,
Ek baar to nahana chahiye.

Nakhre aap ke toba-toba,
gajab aap ka style hai,

message to aap kabhi karte nahi,
bas halla macha rakha hai ki..
hamare pass bhi mobile hai!

नखरे आपके तौबा-तौबा
गजब आपका स्टाईल है,
मेसेज तो आप कभी करते नहीं,
बस हल्ला मचा रखा है की..
हमारे पास भी मोबाईल है।

Mohalle Mein Nayi Masuk Aayi Hai,
Lekar Nakhre Purane,
Lajawab Husn Hai Log Mar Kar Hi Rahenge,
Moti Hai,
Kaali Hai,
Thigani Hai,
To Hone De,
Use Lekar Konsa Tu Ghumne Ja Raha Hai Europ.

Tum door sahi majboor sahi,
Par yaad tumhari aati hai,

Jab saans wahan par leti ho,
To badboo yahaan tak aati hai.

Muqaddar Mein Raat Ko Neend Nahi To Kya,
Muqaddar Mein Raat Ko Neend Nahi To Kya,
Hum Bhi Muqaddar Ko Chuna Lagate Hain,
Aur Din Mein Hi So Jaate Hain.

Tujhe pane ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta hu,
Tere pyar mein jee aur mar sakta hu,

Phir bhi tu nahi mili to koi gham nahi,
Yeh formula dusri pe bhi try kar sakta hu.

Mohabbat Karli Tumse Bahut Sochne Ke Baad,
Ab Kisi Ko Dekhna Nahi Tumhe Dekhne Ke Baad,

Duniya Chhod Denge Tumhe Pane Ke Baad,
Khuda Maaf Kare Itna Jhooth Bolne Ke Baad!

Popcorn ki khushbu,
Mungfali ki bahaar,

Thandi ka mausam aa gaya hai yaar,

Thodi si masti,
Thoda sa pyar,

Muffler sweater rakho dhokar taiyar.
Happy Winter season

Dil ka dard dil todne wala kya jaane,
Pyar ke rivazon ko ye zamaana kya jaane,

Kitni takleef hoti hai ladki patane mein,
Yeh ghar baithe ladki ka baap kya jaane.

Dooriyon ki na parwah kiya karo,
Jab dil chahe yaad kiya karo,
Dushman nahi hain dost hain hum aapke.
Mera sms na aaye to khud bhej diya karo!

Jis Chehre Ko Dekh Kar Haste The Hum,
Aaj Usine ‘Rula Diya’ Khud Ne To Phone Kiya Nahi,

Humne Kiya To Caller Tune… 
‘Tujhe Bhula Diya’

Safar Lamba Hai Dost Banate Rahiye,
Dil Mile Na Mile,
Haath Badalate Rahiye,
Taj Mahal Na Banaiye Mehnga Padega,
Magar Har Taraf Mumtaj Banate Rahiye

Ram Ne Sita Ko SMS Kiya,

 Dear Situ,What’s up?
Main Yaha Mast Hu and Hope Tu Bhi Good Hogi,
Laxman Tujhe Miss Karta Hai…Yaar Tu Tension Na Le,

Main Bahut Jaldi Tujhe Ravan Ke Yaha Se Le Jaunga.
Maine BSNL Ka Sim Liya Hai,

Aur Ravan Ka Number Free Karwa Liya Hai,
Ravan Ko Maine Mobile Per Bahut Gaaliya Di,

Saale Ne Ye Bol Ke Phone Kaat Diya Ki Battery Low Hai,
Main Tujhe Micromax Ka 30 Days Battery Backup,
Dual Sim Wala,
Aur 8GB Ka Card Sad Song Bhar Ke Mr. 

 Hanuman Ke Hath Bhej Raha Hun.
Isme Net Surfing Bhi Hai…
Ab Hum Tum Night Mein Calling Ke Maje Le Payenge,

India Mein 3G Bhi Launch Ho Chuka Hai,
Ho Sake To Lanka Se Video Calling Ka Try Karna…

Laxman Top-up Card Lene Gaya Hai,
Aur Haan Maine Vibhishan Ko Facebook Pe Add Kar Liya Hai. 

 Lanka Mein Kya Ho Raha Hai,
Wo Sab Status Update Kar Deta Hai,
Chal Baad Mein Chat Karenge,
Bye!
Love You… Ram

Jalte hue deepo ki tarah jagmagate rahna,
hamari dua hai sada muskrate rahna,
kitni bhi chappalen pade tumhe e mere bhai,
zindgi bhar aap ladkiya patate rahna.

Aap Ki Chaal Mor Jaise,
Aawaz Koyal Jaise,

Dimag Lomdi Jaise,
Aankhen Hiran Jaise,

Par Kitna Achcha Hota,
Agar 2-3 Quality Insano Jaise Hoti.

Arz kiya hai..
Muskarana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Wah wah..
Gor farmaiye..
Muskarana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Use jo mohabbat samjhe wo sabse bada GADHA hai.

Arz kiya hai:
Aankhon mein nami thi,
Aur vitamin ki kami thi..

Wah!
Wah!

Jis se raat bhar chatting ki woh
girl friend ki mummy thi.

Arj Kiya Hai:
Samma,
Parwane Se Kuchh Kah Rahi Hai,

Samma,
Parwane Se Kuchh Kah Rahi Hai,

Darling Jara Rumaal Dena,
Meri Naak Bahut Bah Rahi Hai.

Teri Saanso Ko Meri Dil Mein Panah Mil Jaye,
Wah Wah
Teri Saanson Ko Meri Dil Mein Panah Mil Jaye,
Agar Tu Na Mile To Ye Dil,
Kisi Aur Ke Ishq Mein Fanah Ho Jaye.

Jisey Dil Diyaa Voh Delhi Chali Gayee,
Jisey Pyaar Kiyaa Voh Italy Chali Gayee,
Dil Ne Kaha Khud Kushi Karle Zalim,
Bijli Ko Haath Lagaaya To Bijli Chali Gayee.

Mohabbat karli tumse bahut sochne ke baad,
Ab kisiko dekna nhi tmhe dekhne ke baad,
Dunia chod denge tumhe pane ke baad,
Khuda maaf kare itna jhoot bolne Ke baad.

Humne unki tasveer apne man mandir mein saja li,
Unki yaadein aapne dil mein basa li,

Lekin jab unhone hame koi tawazzo na di,
To humne bhi nki chhoti behen phasa li.

Kya Mausam Aaya Hai,
Har Taraf Pani Hi Pani Laya Hai,
Ek Jadu Sa Chhaya Hai,
Tum Ghar Se Bahar Mat Niklna,
Warna Log Kahenge Barsat Hui Nahi,
Aur Mendak Nikal Aaya Hai.

Ajib hai nakhre tere,
Ajib hai tera style.

Naak pochne ki tameez nahin 
aur haath mein hai mobile!
Cham Cham kar ke aayi,
Cham Cham kar ke chali gayi,

Main Sindoor leke khada raha,
Aur woh rakhi ban ke chali gayi.
Tumhari Salgirah Pe Jaana Kia Bhejoon,
Apni Jaan Bhejoon Keh Apna Dil Bhejoon,

Phir Sochta Hoon Jaana Kion Na,
Tumhare Liye Kee Hui Shopping Ka Bill Bhejoon

Chala Ja Message Tu Banke Gulab
Hogi Sachi Dosti To Ayega Jawab
Na Aaya Jawab To Mat Hona Udas
Samjh Lena Bartan Saaf Kar Rahein Hain Janab

कमजोर दिल वाले ईसे ना पढें…. खतरनाक शायरी

खिडकी से देखा तो रस्ते पे कोई नही था
खिडकी से देखा तो रस्ते पे कोई नही था
वाह वाह
फिर रस्ते पे जाके देखा तो खिडकी मै कोई नही था |

Wo aaj bhi is garmi mein marr rahi hai,
e-dostoJo maine use ek baar keh diya tha…
Tum is sweater mein katrina kaif lag rahi ho.

Dhoka mila jab bhi pyar mein,
Zindgi mein udasi chha gayi,

Socha tha chhor denge is raah ko,
Kambakht phir ek new number se miss call aa gayi.

Muqaddar mein rat ki…
neend nahi to kya hua,
Hum bhi muqaddar ko dhoka de kar…
din ko so jatay hain.
...
 Oh my God

Use karte hain makeup ka dabba roz kyun,
Ban sanwar kar nikalte hain roz kyun,
Mummy,
tum to kehti thi Eid to kab ki gayi,
Phir padosan se gale milte hain papa roz kyun.

Dhoka Mila Jab Pyar Mein
Zindagi Mein Udasi Chha Gayi
Socha Tha Chhod Denge In Raaho Ko
Per Aaj Mohalle Mein Dusri Aa Gayi

मोहब्बत के खर्चो की बड़ी लंबी कहानी है,
कभी फिल्म दिखानी है तो कभी शोपिंग करानी है,

मास्टर रोज कहता है कहाँ है फीस के पैसे?
उसे समझाऊं मैं कैसे की मुझे छोरी पटानी है!

Winter Ka Zamana Hai,
Msg Karke Aap Ko Satana Hai,

Mausam Bhi Diwana Hai,
2-4 Msg Aap Bhi Kar Do,

Kya..
Balance Bacha K
Naya Sweter Lana Hai.

Krishna ke kadmon pe kadam badhate chalo,
Ab murli nahi to siti hi bajate chalo,

Radha to ghar wale dilayenge hi magar,
Tab tak gopiyon ko hi patate chalo.

प्यार एक झटके में हो जाता है पर उसे..
पूरा करने के लिए बहुत सारे झटके लगाने पड़ते हैं।

अपने दिल में रहने दो ना मुझे,
कसम से बाहर बहुत गर्मी है..
कितना ही जानलेवा फिगर क्यों न हो तेरा..
पर सुन पगली,
ईतना मत ईतरा हमारी तारीफ के बीना सब अधूरा है।
इस गर्मी की वजह से हालात ऐसे हो गये हैं कि ..
आजकल तजुरबा लिखा हुआ भी 
पड़ने में तरबूजा ही आता है।
प्यार की गहराई का पता तब चलता है,

जब बिस्तर पर लड़की पूछ ले..
पूरा चला गया क्या?
दुनिया के सारे झूठ एक तरफ,
ऊपर-ऊपर से करूँगा वाला झूठ एक तरफ।
एयरफोर्स में जाना था,
दोस्तों..

पर जिंदगी रास्ते बदल कर,
मैनफोर्स में घुस गई।
वो दोस्त उम्र भर क्या साथ देंगे जिन्होने..
चौराहे पर पुलिस देखकर बाइक से उतार दिया।
खून में तेरे मिट्टी,
मिट्टी में तेरा खून..

ऊपर सूरज,
नीचे डामर,
बीच में मई और जून।
मटर पनीर समझ कर दोस्त बनाए थे ..
साले सब के सब टिंडे निकले..!

Sharab Sareer Ko Khatam Krti Hai
Sharab Samaj Ko Khatam Krti Hai,

Aao Aaj Is Sharab Ko Khatam Karte Hain,

Ek Bottle Tum Khtam Kro,
Ek Botal Hum Khatam Karte Hai..

Na yeh CHAND hoga na TAARE rahenge,
Kya hum hamesha KUNWARAY rahenge,

Is duniya me kitno ke NIKAH ho gaye,
Kya naseeb mai apne sirf NIKAH ke CHWARE rahenge.

न चांद होगा ना तारे होंगे,
क्या हम इस साल भी कुंवारे होंगे ,

इस दुनिया में कितनों के निकाह हो गए ,
क्या हमारे नसीब में सिर्फ निकाह के छुहारे होंगे।

Ansoon tere nikle aur aankhein meri ho,
Dil tera dhadke aur dhadkane meri ho,

Khuda kare hamari dosti itni gehri ho,
Ki naukri tum karo aur salary meri ho.

“Thand aur insult”
Jitni Mehsoos Karoge Utna Jyada Lagegi*
So..

Be Careless
&
Be Beshram
Enjoy Life,
Enjoy Winter!

Think Hatke,
Jiyo Datke!

Hansti Thi Hansaati Thi,
Dil Ko Bahut Badi Thi,

Dekh Dekh Shaam Aati Thi,
Phir Andar Se Muskurati Thi,

Aaj Pata Chala Ke Woh,
Khud Toh Pagal Thi,

Mujhe Bhi Pagal Banati Thi,

Mooli Gajar Ka Noor Aap Per Barse,
Aapki Chahat Ko Aalu Tamatar Bhi Tarse,
Aapki Zindagi Mein Aaye Itne Baigan Ke,
Aap Kuch Bhi Aur Khane Ko Tarse.

Jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye,
Husan ke tevar nukeele ho gaye,

Hum izhar karne me thode dhele ho gaye,
Aur udhar unke hath peele ho gaye.

Arz Hai:
 Na Muskurane Ko Jee Chahta Hai
Na Kuch Khane-Peene,
Na Sone Ko Jee Chahta Hai
Ye Garmi Ab Barsaat Nahi Hoti
Sab Chhod Kar Ab
Shimla Chale Jane Ko Jee Chahta Hai

Teri khamoshi aur udasi ki wajah 
hum samajh na sake ae dost,
....
Wo to shaam ko teri mummy ne bataya
ke aaj teri chappal se pitai hui hai!

Aapki smile ne saara jahan hila diya,
Aapki smile ne saara jahan hila diya,
Koma say jage mareez ko permanent sula diya..

मेरी कब्र के पास Wi-Fi जरूर लगाना,
क्योंकि मेरे दोस्त..

इतने कमीने है कि Wi-Fi यूज करने के लिए,
जरूर मेरे पास आएगे।
तेरी कमर पर हाथ रक्खा था..
नियत का फिसल कर नीचे सरकना तो लाज़मी था।
आयेंगे तेरी गलि में चाहे देर क्यू न हो जाये,
करेंगे मोहब्बत तुझसे हि चाहे जेल क्यू न हो जाये।
तु Hike‬ की रानी मे ‪Facebook‬ का राजा..
मिलना है तो ‪Whatsapp‬ पे आजा।
गिरा दे जितना पानी है तेरे पास ऐ बादल,
ये प्यास किसी की लेने से बुझेगी तेरे बरसने से नहीं।
अगर इश्क़ करो तो अदब-ऐ-वफ़ा भी सीखो,
यु दोस्त के रूम पर ले जाकर ठोकना मोहब्बत नही होती।
कोई माल में खुश है कोई सिर्फ दाल में खुश है
खुशनसीब है वो लोग..
जो हर हाल में खुश है।
ईंट पर ईंट चढ़ता है तो दीवार बन जाता है,
और..
लड़की पर लड़का चढ़ता है तो परिवार बन जाता है।
हमारी तो किस्मत ही कुछ ऐसी निकली,
जमींन मिली तो बंजर Admin मिला तो कंजर।

Tumhari lovely aankho ne,
Hame aise attract kiya,
Ke sabko neglect karke,
Tumhe hi select kiya.


Yaar Ne Dil Ka Haal Bataana Chhor Diya,
Humne Bhi Gehrayi Me Jana Chhor Diya,
Aap Ne SMS Karna Kya Band Kar Diya,
Humne Mobile Charge Karna Chhor Diya.

Unki gali se mera janaza nikla,
Wo na nikle jinke liye janaza nikla,

Unka ghar aaya to mere dost siti bajane lage,
Rakh ke mera janaza kamine usko patane lage.

Charo aur padhai ka saya hai,
Saare paper mein zero aaya hai,

Hum to yun hi chal dete hao 
bina muh dhoye exam dene,

Aur log kehte hain,
Sala raat bhar padh ke aaya hai.

Tumhari naam ki ghazalein
Chand par likhne ko ji chahta hai.
Par kya karu yeh zalim
Khwab amavas ki raat ko hi aata hai.

Na jaane kab koi taara toot jaaye,
Na jaane kab koi aansu aankh se chut jaaye,
Kuch pal hamare saath bhi has lo,
Na jaane kab tumhare daant toot jaaye..!

Ek Boond Se Sagar Nahi Banta
Rone Se Muqaddar Nahi Banta
Patana Hai To Pura Girls Hostel Patao
Ek Ladki Patake Koi Sikandar Nahi Banta

2 Baar Lips Pe,
2 Baar Gaal Pe,

1 Martaba Mathay Pe,
2 Baar Eyes Pe,

Cold Cream Zaroor Lagana,
Sardi Aa rahi Hai Na.
Happy Winter Season

Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,
Ek kami thi woh bhi puri ho gayi,

Pagal hain woh log jo kehte hain ki,
Chimpanzee ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!

Tajmahal ko dekh kar bola shahjahan ka pota,
Tajmahal ko dekh kar bola shahjahan ka pota,
Aaj hamara bhi bank balance hota,
Agar DADA Aashiq na hota!

Bhaiyo aur Only Bhaiyo,

Neend Nahi Aati Mujhe Tab Se,
Neend Nahi Aati Mujhe Tab Se,
....
5 Rupye Khoye hai Jab Se.

Zindgi Ki Har Ek Udaan Baaki Hai
Har Mod Par Ek Imtihan Baki Hai
Abhi To Sirf Aap Hi Pareshan Hai Mujhse
Abhi To Pura Hindustan Baaki Hai.

Har safar mein aapka saath hum denge,
Apne pyar ki saugat hum denge,
Girne lage to hath hum denge,
aur Na bhi gire to..
EK LAAT HUM DENGE

Kyun kisi ki yaadon mein roya jaye,
Kyun kisi ke khayalo mein khoya jaye,

Mera to yakeen hai,
Bahar mausam bahut kharab hai,
Kyun na razai tankar soya jaye.

Kisi k pass yo yo honey singh ka number hai kya!
Wo kehta rehta tha,
Pass kara du,
phone ghuma du..
...
Exams sar pe hai No. jaruri hain yaar.

Bank Ke Lootere Bank Mein Ek Sher Farmate Hain
Taqdeer Mein Jo Hai Vahi Milega
Wah Wah
Taqdeer Mein Jo Hai Wahi Milega
Hands Up Koi Apni Jagah Se Nahi Hilega

Zindgi mein sada muskurate raho,
fasle kam karo dil milate raho,
dard kaisa bhi ho koi gham na karo,
iodex kharido aur lagate raho.

Ishq hai to ishq ka izhar bhi hone chahiye,
Aadmi ko shakl se bimar bhi hona chahiye,
Yaadon ko keh do,
do chaar din ki chhuti de de,
Akhir ishq mein itvaar bhi hona chahiye.

8-9 Mahine tumhe avoide kiya mujhe,
Lekin ab tum mujhe or dur nahi rakh sakte,
Aaj nahi to kal apni baahon me mujhe jarur loge,

With love
Tumhari purani
”SWEATER”

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Best Funny Shayari in Hindi - Funny Poetry - Funny Status | अध्याय 1

February 20, 2022

Best Funny Shayari in Hindi

मुझे मत ढूंढो इस जहाँ की तन्हाई में.
ठण्ड बहुत है में तो हूँ अपनी रजाई में

 Mujhe Mat Dhundo Is Jahan Ki Tanhai Mein.
Thand Bahut Hai Mein To Hun Apni Rajai Mein

Haath mein taqat hai,
toh tajmahal ko hila kar dekh,
Warna aa baith ke do peg whiskey maar,
aur tajmahal ko hilta hua dekh..

Heer ro ro kar
Raanjhe se keh rahi hai,
Haath chhor kameene
Meri naak beh rahi hai.

Koi Pathar Se Na Maare Mere Deewane Ko,
Koi Pathar Se Na Maare Mere Deewane Ko,
..
Nuclear Power Ka Zamana Hai,
Bom Se Uda Do Saale Ko.

Manzil unhi ko milti hai,
jinke hoslo me jaan hoti hai,
aur band bhatti me bhi daaru unhi ko milti hai..
jinki bhatti me pehchaan hoi hai.

मंजिल उन्हीं को मिलती है,
जिनके हौसलों में जान होती है…
और और बंद भट्ठी में भी दारू उन्हीं को मिलती है,
जिनकी भट्ठी में पहचान होती है!

Main Ek Seedha Sadha Insan Hu
Par Main Apni Baayi Aankh Se Pareshan Hu

Jab Bhi Main Kisi Ko Dekhta Hu 
Meri Baayi Aankh Chal Jati Hai
Bachpan Ka Ek Kissa Suniye,
Ye Baat Hai Bachpan Ki

Meri Class Me Padhti Thi Rekha 
Maine Usko Dekha
Meri Baayi Aankh Chal Gayi
Wo Uchhal Gayi Machal Gayi,
Aur Kaksha Se Nikal Gayi

Principal Madam Ka Bulawa Aaya
Unhone Mujhe Lamba Chowra Bhashan Pilaya

Isse Pehle Ki Wo Mujhe Aur Kuch Keh Paati
Meri Baayi Aankh Chal Gayi
Unhone Mujhe Vidyalaya Se Nikala
Phir Mai Sidha Andaman Aa Pahucha

Andaman Me Meri Shadi Ki Baat Chali
Jaise Hi Maine Sasu Ji Ko Dekha
Meri Baayi Aankh Chal Gayee
Sasur Ji Kehne Lage Bete Shadi Karne Aaye Ho 
Meri Beti Se Aur Line Marte Ho Meri Patni Ko
Tabse Main Kunwara Tha

Shayad Bhagvan Ko Mujh Par Taras Aaya
Unhone Mujhe Shivani Se Milaya
Maine Use Apna Haal Bataya
Tab Jake Usne Mujhe Apnaya

Ab Main Shadi Shuda Hoon
Aur Ek Natkhat Chulbuli Beti Ka Baap Hoon

Na Need Aaye Raaton Ko,
Na Chain Aaye Din Bhar,

Khuda Se Pucha Maine..
Kya Ye Pyar Ka Bukhar Hai?

Khuda Ne Jawab Diya..
Arre Nahi Garmi Mei Sabka Hi Aesa Haal Hai.

Sitam dhane ki had hoti hai,
pas na ane ki roth jane ki hadh hoti hai..

Ek SMS to kar de Zalim,
Paise bachane ki bhi hadh hoti hai..


सितम ढाने की हद होती है,
पास ना आने की रूठ जाने की हद होती है,

एक SMS तो कर दे जालिम,
पैसे बचाने की भी हद होती है!

Arz hai..
Pink lips are the girl's beauty,

Wah Wah
Pink lips are the girl's beauty,

Wah Wah
And Kissing them is the Boys duty.

‍Chali jati hain wo beauty parlour mein yun,
Unka maksad hain misaal-e-hoor ho jana..

Ab kon samjhaye en ladkiyo ko
Mumkin nahi kishmish ka phir se angoor ho jana.
eh jo ladkiyon ke baal hote hai,
ladkon ko fasane ka jaal hote hai.

Khoon choos keti hai ladkon ka saara,
tabhi to inke honth laal hote hai!
Kasam Se Har Ek Ladki Bhula Dunga,
Sab hi Ki Tasverain Jala DunGa,

Ek Tum hi Raho Ge Iss Dil Me !
Balance Dalwa Do Bhout Dua Dunga.
Pyar karne ki apni 1 reet hai..
Pyaar ka dusra naam hi to Preet hai…
Isliye Try maro har Ladki (girl) par..
.
Kyunki
.
Darr ke aage Jeet hai.
Na ishq kar mere yaar yeh ladkiya (girls) bahut satati hai,
na karna in par aitbaar yah kharcha bahut karwati hai,
recharge tum karwa ke dete ho aur number mera lagati hai..

Jis Hospital ke Hum Doctor hain,
Humari Patni Waha ki Nurse hain,
Kya ajeeb zulm sehna padta hain,
Apni hi Biwi ko Sister kehna padta hai.

Tajmahal kisi ke liye ek AJOOBA hai,
To kisi ke liye pyar ka EHSAS hai,
Hamare tumhare liye to BAKWAS hai,
Kyon ki ki roz badalti hamari MUMTAZ hai.

Chali jati hain wo beauty parlour mein yun,
Unka maksad hain misaal-e-hoor ho jana..
Ab kon samjhaye en ladkiyo ko
Mumkin nahi kishmish ka fir se angoor ho jana.

Woh Rooth Kar Kehti Hai Humse
Tumhara To Mel-Jol Mehnga Ho Gaya Hai
Us Pagli Ko Kaun Samjhaye
Ke Petrol Mehnga Ho Gaya Hai

Log ishq karte hain bade shor ke saath,
Humne bhi kiya tha bade zor ke saath,

Magar ab karenge zara gaur ke saath,
Kyunki kal dekha tha use kisi aur ke saath!

Bindas muskurao kya gam hai,
Zindgi me tension kisko kam hai,

Yaad karne wale to bahut hai aapko,
Dil se ‘TANG’ karne wale to sirf HUM hai.

Neend jab mujhe aagosh mein leti hai,
Aap Ka chehra nigahon mein bus jaata hai,
ek dum say meri aankh khul jaati hai,
Dil se bay sakhta yeh awaaz aati hai,
..
.“AMMI BHOOT”

हम दिल फेक आशिक़ है, हर काम में कमाल कर दे,
जो वादा करे वो पूरा हर हाल में कर दे,

क्या जरुरत है जानू को लिपस्टिक लगाने की,
हम चूम-चूम के ही होंठ उसके लाल कर दे !

Hum dil fek aashiq har kam me kamal kar de.
Jo wada kare use pura har haal me kar de.

Tujhe lipstick lagane ki kya jarurat,
hum hot chum-chum ke lal kar de.

Tere khoobsurat aankhon mein
Aansoo acche nahi lagte,

Chahe jitna bhi roye lekin
Kabhi sachche nahi lagte.

Raat Ko Jaagta Hu Din Mein Sota Hun,
Kuchh Isi Tarah Se Maine Apna Jeevan Bana Liya Hai,

Kya Hua Agar Sooraj Ki Roshni Nahi Hai,
Hamara Kaam Toh Chandni Mein Bhi Hota Hai,

Ab Toh Humne Machron Ko Dost,
Aur Makhiyon Ko Dushman Bana Liya Hai,

Isi Tarah Se Humne,
Apna Jeevan Ka Badlaav Aap Ko Bata Diya Hai.

Tumhe kya pata ke gum kya hai,
Tumhe kya pata gum kise kehte hain,
Tum kya jaano gum kya cheez hai,

Kyonki…
Tumne to hamesha THOOK se hi envelop chipkaya hai.

Ishq Ke Khayaal Bohat Hain..
Ishq KE Charche Bohat Hain..

Sochte Hain Hum Bhi Kar Le Ishq..
Par Sunte Hain Ishq Mein Kharche Bohat Hain.

Sheetal Sheetal vayu Chali,
Aasman Hua Suhana,

Gadhe Bhi sms Padhne Lage,
Shikshit Hua jamana.
Happy Winter Time.

CHAPPAL chhoti ho jaye toh PAAON mein nahi aati,
Wah-Wah
CHAPPAL chhoti ho jaye to PAAON mein nahi aati,
Aur GIRLFRND moti ho jaye to BAHON mein nahi aati

Mohabbat mein jab mujhe Dhoka mila,
To zindagi me charo aur udasi cha gayi,
Socha tha ki aag laga dunga es duniya ko,
Par kambhakt colony mein dusri aa gayi.

Aisi WANI boliye ki jamkar JHAGDA hoye,
Gour farmaye..!
Aisi wani boliye ki jamkar JHAGDA hoye,
Par usse na boliye jo aap se TAGDA hoye!

Duniya mein reh kar sapnon mein kho jao,
Kisi ko apna bana lo ya kisi ke ho jaao,
Agar kuchh bhi nahi hota hai to,
Chadar-takiya lo aur so jao.

Aashiqui Bhi Dosto Kya Classical Sangeet Thi
Raag To Ohi Jaane Kya Tha,
Jaane Kya Gaate Rahe

Zindagi Bhar Ishq Ka Izhaar Karne Ke Liye
Woh Bhi Haqlaate Rahe Aur Hum Bhi Haqlaate Rahe.

Julfo me fulo ko saja kar aayi hai,
chehre se dupatta utha kar aayi hai,

kisi ne pucha ki kitni khubsurat lag rahi hai,
Hamne kaha sawad aaj naha kar aayi hai!

जुल्फों में फूलों को सजा के आयी,
चेहरे से दुपट्टा उठा के आयी,

किसी ने पूछा आज बड़ी खुबसूरत लग रही है,
हमने कहा शायद आज नहा के आयी!

Aap baago k sab se hasin gul hai,
Hum to bas aap ke kadmo ki dhool hai,

Ab jada gurur mat karna kyoki ..
Aaj april fool hai.

Cid ne sone se nata jod liya,
Cid ne sone se nata jod liya,
Jis room me mana raha tha abhijit suhagraat,
Daya ne uska darwaza hi tod diya.

BF Ne GF Ki SaHeli Ki SHaaN Me
Arz Kiya
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai
Meri ManZiL Tu NaHi 
Teri SaHeLi Hai.

Marne Ke Baad Nashib Me Jannat Ho Na Ho
Arey Dosto Zinda Hain Jab Tak SMS Kar Lo
Kya Pata Kabr Me Network Ho Na Ho

Na Muskurane Ko Jee Chahta Hai,
Na Kuch Khane-Peene,
Na Sone Ko Jee Chahta Hai,

Ye Garmi Ab Bardast Nahi Hoti,
Sab Chhod Kar Ab Shimla Chale Jane Ko Jee Chahta Hai.

Aam Meethe,
Angoor Khatte Aam Meethe,
Angur Khatte Mere Shair Padhne Wale Ullu Ke Patthe

Hawa Ka Jhoka Aaya,
Teri Khushbu Sath Laya,
Hawa Ka Jhoka Aaya,
Teri Khushbu Sath Laya,
Mai Samajh Gayi Ki,
Tu Aaj Phir Nahi Nahaya.

ऐ खुदा हिचकियों में
कुछ तो फर्क डालना होता
अब कैसे पता करूँ कि
कौनसी वाली याद कर रही है
Taza hawa ka jhoka aaya,
Kushbu tere sath laya,

Phir mere dil me khayal aaya,
Ke lagta hai ki,

Aaj bhi tu..
Nahi ‘NAHAYA’

Apni raah khud chuno,
Dil jo kahe vahi karo,

Apne peechche walon ko aage mat jane do,
Aur jo aage hain unse aage niklo,

Tabhi ek achche rikshaw wale ban paoge.

Usne Jis Jis Jagah Rakkhe Kadam
Humne Woh Har Jameen Choom Li
Aur Vo Bewafa Ghar Aa Kr Kahti Hai,
“Aap Ka Ladka Mitti Khata Hai”

Zindgi Ki Har Ek Udaan Baaki Hai,
Har Mod Par Ek Imtihan Baki Hai,
Abhi To Sirf Aap Hi Pareshan Hai Mujhse,
Abhi To Pura Hindustan Baaki Hai ?

Udhar aap majboor baithe hain,
Idhar hum khamosh baithe hain,
Baat ho to kaise ho janab..
Jab dono taraf do kanjus baithe hain..

Rainbow Mein Colour Hota Hai Violet,
Wah Wah!
Wah Wah!
Rainbow Mein Colour Hota Hai Violet,
Mam May I Go to the Toilet.

Zindagi lambi hai dost banate raho,
Dil mile na mile haath milate raho,
Taj Mahal banana to bahut costly hai,
Per har gali mein ek Mumtaz banate raho.

Hum Jeete 1 Bar Hain
Hum Marte Ek Baar Hain
Pyar Bhi Ek Baar Hota Hai
Aur Shadi Bhi Ek Bar Hi Hoti Hai
Toh Fir Ye Saale Exams Bar-Bar Kyon?
...
“Jago Student Jago”

Jab Tum Safed Saadi Per Laal Bindi Lagati Ho,
Kasam Se,
Ambulance Nazar Aati Ho,
Farak Sirf Itna Hai Ki Wo Ghaylo Ko Lekar
Jati Hai,
Aur Tum Ghayal Kar Ke Jati Ho.

Tu kahe to chaand taare tod du,
Tu kahe to bandh darwaze khol du,

Tu kahe to yeh duniya chhod du,
Tu ek baar haske to dekh mere dost,

Tere saare gande daanton ko tod du.

Duniya Walo Se Chupa Kar
Unki Tasveer Bathroom Mein Laga Rakhi Hai,
Wah Wah
Duniya Walo Se Chupa Kar
Unki Tasveer Bathroom Mein Laga Rakhi Hai,
Aur Har Ghadi Unka Didar Ho Isliye
Julab Ki Goli Kha Rakhi Hai

Kash pyaar ka insurance ho jata,
Pyar karne se pehle premium bharwaya jata,

Pyar mein wafa mili to theek warna,
Bewafaon pe jo kharcha hota uska claim to mil jata.

Ek dukhi girlfriend ne,
Apne boyfriend ke liye Shayari likhi..

Phoolo ka raja,
Baharo ka shahzada..
Phoolo ka raja baharo ka shahzada
.
Dil todh kar chala gaya..
KUTTA KAMINA HARAMZADA

Ek Truck Ke Piche Likha Tha,
“Sawan Ko Aane Do”Ek Doosre Truck 
Usmein Peechhe Se Ghus Gaya,
Pata Hai,
Uske Peeche Kya Likha Tha?
“Aaya Sawan Jhoom Ke”

Aasman mein kaali ghata chhai hai,
Aaj fir se gharwali se maar khai hai,

Dil to karta hai…sudhar jao magar,
Kamwali aaj phir bheeg ke aayi hai.

Ankho me aansu,
Chehre par hansi hai,
Saanso me aahein,
Dil me bebasi hai,
Pehle kyun nahi bataya ki,
Darwaje mein ungli fansi hai.

Aye Mere SMS Mere Dost Ke Pass Jana,
Agar Vo So Raha Ho To Shor Mat Machaana,
Jab Vo Jage To Dhire Se Muskurana,
Phir Kehna Sote Rahte Ho,
Kanjoos SMS Karo!

Sheeshe Se Sheesha Takraye Jo Bhi Ho Anjaam,
Sheeshe Se Sheesha Takraye Jo Bhi Ho Anjaam,
..
Jai Shri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram
Jai Shri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram

Arz kiya hai..

Baith ke toilet mein nawab ke jaise..
Sardi ke mausam mein sochta hu aise..

Baith ke toilet mein nawab ke jaise..
Sardi ke mausam mein sochta hu aise.

Ki kar to li hai tune beta….
abb thande paani se dhoega Kaise.

Sitaro mein aap,
Hawao mein aap,

Fizao mein aap,
Baharo mein aap,

Dhoop mein aap,
Chaaon mein aap,

Sach hi suna hai ki buri aatmao 
ka koi thikana nahi hota.

Jis ladki k chehre par aaj kal naqab hota hai,
Wo naqab ashiq k liye azab hota hai,
Mat marna naqab wali ladki pe mere dost,
Khubsurat packing me maal aksar kharab hota hai.

Jise Dil Diya Woh Dilli Chali Gayi,
Jis Se Pyar Kiya Woh Itli Chali Gayi,

Dil Ne Kaha Khudkhushi Kar Le Jaalim,
Bijli Ko Haath Lagaya Toh Bijli Chali Gayi.

Tumhari yaad dil se jaane nahi denge,
Tumhare jaisa dost khone bhi nahi denge,
Roj sharafat se SMS kiya karo warna,
Ek kaan ke niche denge aur rone bhi nahi denge.

Hume Tumse Love Hai,
Please Refuse Na Karna,
Yeh Zero Watt Ka “Hope” Bulb Hai,
Please Ise Fuse Mat Karna.

Meri Zindagi Ek Jua Ban Ke Reh Gayi
Meri Zindagi Ek Jua Ban Ke Reh Gayi
Maine Jise Pyar Kiya
Voh Mere Bachon Ki Bua Ban K Reh Gayi

Aapko humse kabhi khone nahi denge,
aapko mujh se alag hone nahi denge,
kabhi sms bhi kar dia kro warna,
aankh mein mirchi dal denge aur dhone bhi nahi denge.

Koi najro se ishara kar leta hain,
Koi aankho se kuch kah deta hain,
Bada hi muskil ho jata hai jawab dena,
Jab koi English me baat kar leta hai.

Aaj Kuchh Sharmaye Se Lagte Ho,
Sardi Ke Karan Kapkapaye Se Lagte Ho,
Chehra Aapka Khil Utha Hai,
Hafte Ke Baad Nahaye Se Lagte Ho

Dil mein khuda hai,
Aankhon mein nasha hai,
Bato mein maza hai,
Chahat mein ada hai,
Andaz bhi juda hai,
Dosti mein wafa hai,
Arey yaar..
Isiliye to sari duniya HUM par fida hai.

ना वक्त इतना हैं कि सिलेबस पूरा किया जाए;
ना तरकीब कोई की एग्जाम पास किया जाए;
ना जाने कौन सा दर्द दिया है इस पढ़ाई ने;
ना रोया जाय और ना सोया जाए।

Engineering College Student:
Rehne Ki Yahaan Sabki Aukat Nahi Hoti,
Bina Beer Aur Daru Ke Yahan Raat Nahi Hoti,
Ye Engineering College Hai Mere Dost,
Yahan Bina Maa Bahan Ke Baat Nahi Hoti.

Baithe hain tere khayalon mein,
Kagaz pe likha hai tera naam,
Kagaz pe teri tasveer laga ke,
Likha hai yeh paigam,
Zinda ya murda pakadne wale ko,
Milega 50000 ka inaam.

Yaaro Mere Marne Ke Baad,
Aansu Mat Bahana Yaaro Mere Marne Ke Bad,
Aansoo Mat Bahana Jyada Yaad Aaye,
Toh Upar Chale Aana.

Aapki bato pe dil haruWAH!
WAH!
Aapki surat pe jan waruWAH!
WAH!
Jis din nahi aata aap ka sms 
dil karta hai aapko
patak-patak ke maru!

Kaya Aankhen Hai,
Kaya Baaten Hain,
Kaya Chehra Tumne Paya Hai,
Aisa Lagta Hai Jaise,
Jaise,
Peepal Ke Ped Se Bhoot Utarkar Aaya Hai.

Arz kiya hai,
zara gaur farmaiye ga,
Naa hi zaroorat hai sitaron ki,

Naa hi zaroorat hai faltu yaaron ki,
Ek dost chahiye aapke jaisa,
Jo watt laga de Hazaron ki.

Khate Hain Kasam Hum,
Aapko Kabhi Khone Nahi Denge,

Aap Ho Jao Hum Se Juda,
Hum Aisa Hone Nahi Denge,

Aapko Bhijwa Rahe Hain,
Keemti Tohfa Machhron Ka,

Jo Raat Bhar,
Aap Ko Sone Nahin Denge.

Dil Ka Dard Dil Todne Wale Kya Jaane,
Pyar Ke Rivazon Ko Zamana Kya Jaane,
Hoti Hai Kitni Takleef Ladki Patane Mein,
Ye Ghar Baitha Uska Baap Kya Jaane.

Shadi Se Pahle Biwi Likhati Thi,
Tumhare Charno Ki Daasi,

Ab Shaadi Ke Baad Likha Jata Hai,
Tumhare Khoon Ki Pyasi,

Mana Ke Skirt Pahanane Se,
Bhagane Se Aasani Rahti Hai,

Magar Bhagane Ki Nobat Bhi,
Aati Toh Hai Skirt Ke Sabab Se,

Hotel Mein Jiske Saath Tha Main,
Kamar Mein Haath Dale,
Yaar Woh Meri Biwi Nahi Kisi Aur Ki Biwi Thi.

Tumhara Naam Phool Rakhu To Bikhar Jaoge,
Dil Rakhu To Toot Jaoge,
Chalo Bijli Rakhta Hoon,
Chhor Kar Jaoge To ..
Ek Ghante Baad Wapis Aa Jao Ge.

Arz Kiya hai..

Dil hai sachha aur dimaag hai Kachha,
Wah wah..
Dil hai sachha aur dimaag hai Kachha,
Wah wah..
Tere msgs nahi aa rahe kya baat hai Bachha.

Dhadkan Dil Ki Ruk Jati Hai,
Sanse Aksar Tham Jati Hai,

Bahut Buri Halat Hoti Hai Yaaro,
Jab GF Se Shaadi Karne Ki Naubat Aati Hai!

Jab jab ghire badal teri yaad aayi,
Jab jhoom ke barsa sawan teri yaad aayi,

Jab-jab mein bhiga teri yaad aayi,
Ab raha nahi jata,
Chhatri lauta de Bhai.

Hamne Dhoop Samjhi,
Woh Chhaya Nikali,

Hamne Gaay Samjhi,
Woh Bhains Nikali,

Beda Gark Ho In Beauty Parlaro Ka,

Hamne Toh Unhe Kadki Samjha Tha,
Lekin Woh Ladki Ki Maa Nikali.

दोस्त रूठे तो रब रूठे,
फिर रूठे तो जग छूटे,
अगर फिर रुठे दिल टूटे,
और अगर फिर रूठे?
निकाल डंडा..
मार साले को जब तक डंडा न टूटे

 Dost Ruthe to Rab Ruthe,
Fir Ruthe to Jag Chhute,
Agar Fir Ruthe Dil Tute,
Aur Agar Fir Ruthe?
Nikal Danda..
Maar Sale Ko Jab Tak Danda Na Tute

Ek Aadmi,
Khud Khusi Par Bhasan De Raha Tha:-

Khud Khusi Paap Hai,
Julum Hai,
Gunah Hai,

Buzdil Hai,
Pagalpan Hai,

Khudkhushi Karne Se Behtar Hai Ki ,
Aadmi Khud Ko Goli Maar Le.

Shaadi Karne Waale,
Kyon Kaath Mein Pair Fansaya,

Bazaar Mein Doodh Bahut Tha,
Kyu Bhains Khareed Laya,

Nadan Hai Woh Jo Mohabbat Kiya Karte Hain,
Hoshiyaar Hai Woh Jo Maje Liya Karte Hain,

Jis Dil Se Tumhe Chaha Woh Dil Hamara Tha,
Tumne Hame Chaha Woh Dil Udhar Ka Tha.

Teri Yaadon Mein,
Kuchh Aisi Baat Hai,

Ke Har Waqat Teri Yaadein,
Hamare Sath Hain,

Dil Chahta Hai Ki,
Tujhko Tujhse Se Chura Lo,

Par Mummy Kahti Hain,
Ki Chori Karna Buri Baat Hai.

Yaad Rakh Kar Meri Dosti Ko Tumne,
Meri Zindagi Par Ehsaan Kar Diya,
Mere Mobile Mein Bhi Ye Aakhri Rupeeya Tha,
Le Voh Bhi Tere Naam Kar Diya.

Aaj Deedar,
Kal Yaar,
Parson Pyaar,
Phir Ekraar,
Phir Intzaar,
Phir Takraar,
Phir Draar,
Saari Mehnat Bekar,
Aur Aakhir Me Ek Aur Devdas,
At Beer Bar.

Aapki yaad mein ek sher arz kiya hai..

Aaj hai mangal,
kal tha peer..
Wah wah…

Aja hai mangal,
kal tha peer..
Kabhi to kuchh bheja kar ‘FAQEER’.

Mat kar mere dost haseeno se mohabbat,
Woh to aankhon se waar karti hain.

Maine teri wali ki aankhon mein dekha hai,
Woh to saali mujh se bhi pyar karti hai.

दोस्ती अगर बुरी है तो होने मत दो,
हो गई तो उसे खोने मत दो,
और अगर दोस्त हो सबसे प्यारा तो….
उस दोस्त को चैन की नींद सोने मत दो.

 Dosti Agar Buri Hai to Hone Mat Do,
Ho Gai to Use Khone Mat Do,
Aur Agar Dost Ho Sabse Pyara to….
Us Dost Ko Chain Ki Neend Sone Mat Do


Har zindagi pyar ki mohtaj nahi hoti…
or har safed imarat Taj nahi hoti,
Are pyar main marne walo kabhi yaari mein jikar dekho…
kyunki kalyug main koi ladki mumtaj nhi hoti…

Actually Basically Biologically Technically 
Chemically Physically Mentally Mathematically 
Electrically Normally Mechanically & Finally
...
I am So Sweet.

Apni Surat Ka Kabhi Toh Deedar De,
Tadap Raha Hun Ab Aur Intezaar Na De,
Apni Aawaz Nahi Sunani Toh Mat Suna,
Kam Se Kam Ek Miss Call Hi Mar De.

Kadam kadam pe hawa ki aahat ka dhyan rakhna,
Mushkil samay mein bhi iss dost ko yaad rakhna,

Hamari yaadon ki khushboo zaroor aayegi,
Tum bus apni naak saaf rakhna.

Tumko dekha to khayal aaya,
Tumko dekha to khayal aaya,

Tumko dekha to khayal aaya,
Paglon ke stock mein naya maal aaya.

Zameen par wo mera naam likhte hai aur mitate hai,
Unka to timepass ho jata hai,
Kambakht…
Mitti mein hum mil jate hai.

निगाहों से निगाहें मिला कर तो देखो,
कभी किसी लड़की को पटा कर तो देखो।

हसरतें दिल में दबाने से क्या फ़ायदा,
अपने हाथों से ज़रा दबा कर तो देखो।

Muskurana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Muskurana to har ladki ki adaa hai,

Use jo mohabbat samjhe,
Woh sabse bada gadha hai.

Sharm to unhe aati hai,
Jo sharm se sharmate hai,
Hum to Besharm hai,
kyu ki…Sharm humse sharmati hai.

Jailer:
Suna hain tum Shayar ho
Kuch sunao yaar..


Qaidi:
 “Gham-E-Ulfat me jo zindagi kati humari
Jis din jamanat huyi zindagi khatam tumhari”

Chhup gaya badli mein jaake,
Chaand bhi sharma gaya,

Chhup gaya badli mein jaake,
Chaand bhi sharma gaya,

Aur aapko dekha to,
Bhooton ko paseena aa gaya.

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